To sir with love

no reply :-(

It just struck me that I have less than 6 months left in this institute. By April next year, I would have finished 18 years of education, spread over 5 separate educational institutions covering a latitudinal range from Andaman and Nicobar Islands and an attitudinal diversity encompassing both rigid discipline and complete autonomy. At the end of it all, what is it that I have actually learnt.
Well a couple of things, to be frank. Firstly that the way the education system is run in the country means that very often studying is the prime obstacle to a student's learning. Education is supposed to transcend books, memorization, go beyond the written word, affect each and every aspect of a human life. It is a force, a very potent force, for it unleashes the power of human thought, surely the most constructive and at the same time, destructive force the world has ever known. Learning is a process without end, with no set timings and no fixed arena where it happens. It is experiential, books and other such media can only be facilitators of the process by which a person makes sense of the world around him or her. Yet we often treat their contents as the final destination of scholastic investigation. There ought to be a joy in learning, a joy of being able to think and explain the mysteries and complexities of the world around you by building on principles extracted from books written and thoughts expressed by others. Yet how many of us view education in that paradigm? Education is seen only as a means of getting a good job. I take a different view. If the worth of education is purely in its instrumentality, then let us close down all schools and apprentice all our children to blacksmiths and carpenters. The difference between an educated person and a highly skilled person lies in the ability to think differently. In a sense, education is a great leveller. A person may not be as strong as a blacksmith, but if he is educated, he can build a machine that can do the work of ten blacksmiths in a day. The uneducated blacksmith is an obedient workhorse, he can do his work the way it is supposed to be done efficiently all day long. The educated person will question why does it need to be done this way, is there no better method. Thus education is a tool of revolution, arming those who gain it with the weapons of thought to challenge conventional wisdom, agitate them enought to question and reject what is commonly believed and then strive to change things around them.
I've come a long way from the time when I was 5 years old, taking my first steps into school. The trajectory of my life has taken me from the liberal-middle class, progressive ethos of Modern School Barakhamba Road, to the egalitarian Jesuit ethos of Carmel School, Port Blair, to the stifling greenhouse of IIT Delhi, to the freedom and diversity of UMASS, Amherst and finally, to this motley mix of people and ideas, IIMA. Each one has affected me in its own way.
As I sit back to think about the common thread that runs between each of these institutions, the answer is invariably, the teachers. Over the course of the last 18 years, I've seen all types of them, invigorating, soporific, inspiring, demotivating, cynical, idealistic, lenient and strict. Yet, the only thing I really believe that separates a good teacher from a bad one is the realization that the teacher is also the taught. A teacher doesn't really have any answers to provide to a student, at best they can offer a point of view and more importantly, a way to think. Those teachers who put themselves on a pedestaland consider themselves omniscient and consider stuffing facts and ideas into the heads of pupils are the truly poor teachers, for they achieve nothing of the elightening mission they champion. A true teacher would firstly acknowledge the limitations of his or her own knowledge and would see the process of tutelage as a two way learning process. The inspirational teachers are the ones who assist their pupils on their journey of intellectual refinement, not by giving them all the answers, but teaching them how and where to look for those answers.
In a sense, a teacher's job is paradoxical. A teacher's greatest utility lies in making himself or herself useless. He or she is most valuable when he or she is no longer needed by the student. A teacher can only lead a student up to a certain point and then leave him alone to forge his own way after giving him the necessary assurance that he will never have to go backwards for ignorance of how to proceed. Where he ends up is something he will decide for himself. If only more and more teachers making students mindlessly recite passages from books would learn this, our country would have far more educators than instructors.

De Profundis

I'm writing this particular post because I want to have a chronicle of 4 events that have touched me deeply in the past few days and I would go so far as to say, transformed me.
The first was watching the movie "The Motorcycle Diaries". It tells the story of the 10,000 kilometre long journey undertaken by Ernesto Guevara de la Serna through South America, a journey which was to prove instrumental in him becoming Che Guevara. The movie is stunningly shot in South America but Che didn't have time to gaze and admire at the beauty of his home continent. He was too preoccupied by the stark reality of deprivation and exploitation that was rampant in those times. The most touching scenes are the ones where he talks to people of native Indian descent and is horrified at the poverty in which they have to sustain themselves thanks to centuries of oppression by the European settlers. The most poignant scene is when he stands in front of the ruins of Machchu Pichchu and exclaims that a civilization that could create this does not deserve to be displaced by a barbaric one, which is what he considered the conquistadors to be. As they keep traversing the continent, they meet and talk to more such people till the youthful, even boyish, Ernesto changes forever. He spends time with the underprivileged, works among lepers and becomes more and more convinced of the need for a revolution, even a violent one to rid South America of its despotic rulers. Now Che is someone I have always admired, even if not always in agreement with his methods but after seeing the story of his transformation, I felt a sudden sense of unease within, there is so much wrong with the world around us, yet we all sit comfortable with it all, the misery and injustice around us should stir us, if not to eradicate it, if not even to protest against it then at least to acknowledge it. There is something terribly unfulfilling about living life like this. Like Che says in the end of the movie, "something within me has changed forever".
The second incident was my visit to the Gandhi Ashram here in Ahmedabad. I've always wanted to go there and as luck would have it, we were taken there as part of a course on Ethics. The Ashram lies in a bustling part of Ahmedabad city, by the roadside, between a marketplace and a petrol pump, as mundane a location as you could find. Just like the Mahatma himself, an apostle of purity among ordinary men and women. We spent two hours in that place and it felt like a lifetime. Going over his life through photographs and his possessions preserved there, I felt a sudden purgation. Here is a man who was as human as you and I, yet he achieved almost God-like status simply by following his principles and living by simple ideals. He truly understood the people of his country and today it is hard to even imagine the kind of respect and reverence he got from his countrymen, of all religions, regions and creeds. As I stood in front of the collage displaying his life, I could not help but cry. Here was an ordinary man who became extra-ordinary through his thoughts, his courage, his convictions and his discipline. Standing there I contrasted his life with mine (not that I have any pretensions to even a hundredth of his greatness and stature), I stood ashamed of my often elastic morals. I decided that day that even if I could never aspire to the Mahatma's greatness, I could at least be his follower. Thus I decided that day to never abuse again and to try and limit all my indulgences, whether it be food, drink or anything else. Later I went down to the banks of the Sabarmati and I have never experienced the kind of peace and contentment I did at that moment.
The third thing happened a couple of weeks ago. I got talking to someone here who's one of my closest friends about life, love and other such trivialities. My friend has been going through some tough times and had been a cycle of depression for almost a year now. And it wasn't always like that, I remember that for the initial period of the first year, he was a very jovial and fun loving person. Then somewhere along the way, he started slipping more and more into depression and started staying away from others. Now I've seen this happen with others and I think when you isolate yourself from others, the mind becomes an echo chamber for negative thoughts, you never break out of the vicious cycle of feeling bad and thinking negative. In the first year, with so much work and pressure on us, we did not meet and talk very often but with things easing up in the second year, we had more opportunities to talk and make up lost ground. I learnt about all that was bothering him and in turn shared my feelings and fears. I also tried to help him, gave him pep-talks and tried to make him feel better. He told me something that someone else had said to him about his transformation - "____, you had a nice smile once". It was true, I had hardly seen him smile in the last few months and he agreed with it. It struck me so deeply that I wrote it on our dorm blackboard outside my room. Next day we had an all night talk session, after which we went out at 7am to have a cup of tea in front of IIMA's main gate. There's a temple close by and my friend gave me a ten rupee note he had found on the ground one day and he had pledged to give it to charity. He wanted me to go to the temple and put it in the donation box. I asked him to accompany me and do it himself. He declined, because he's an atheist and stood outside. I went in and kneeled in front of the Gods and for the first time in my life, I did not ask anything for myself. I asked God to take care of my family, my brother and help my friend feel better. I guess genuine, unselfish prayers work, because a couple of days later, I went up to him and he told me that he was feeling fine and happy now, he had shelved his plans to go home. I asked him what happened and he said that it was just one incident that happened earlier in the day that changed everything. I can't describe that here but it was one of those mundane, everyday conversations he had with another friend of his and like a bolt of lightning, everything was fine for him. The problems that he had are still there I suppose but now he is determined to be happy and fight through them. I'd like to believe that there really is a God. The blackboard outside my room now reads "You have a nice smile....once again!!)
The last was again something which has moved me deeply. I was chatting with a female friend of mine and she went over significant incidents of her life. In between stories of growing up as a normal, fun loving girl, she suddenly confided in me that she had been sexually abused as a child. Even while writing that down, I had to pause and take a break because I still haven't come to terms with the enormity of that statement. At that moment too, my mind had gone blank, there was nothing I could think of. Then suddenly a torrent of emotions came up, first disgust at the beast who had done this to her, revulsion at the thought of the kind of things he must have done to her, then sympathy for what she had gone through and finally disgust at myself and her other friends. She has always been someone who keeps quiet, doesn't talk to many people, hardly ever smiles and at times gets angry at people. Many people think that sh ehas an attitude problem, some think of her as being snooty. I myself told her to start smiling moreand mingle with people (of course I said it in a way that was not offensive or even critical, I said a lot of genuine nice things about her first). But the fact remains that I diagnosed her/ prescribed solutions for her without for once thinking of what might have gone on in her life to make her behave like that. It's easy to criticize and slot people but I felt ashamed that I fell into that trap without even stopping to think if there was a reason behind her actions. And though I had always respected her for her intelligence and her kind, helpful nature before this, my respect for her went up even more after I got to know this, because it takes a lot of courage and strength to get over something like this and achieve all that she has done so far. My respect for myself, however, has plumetted for a while, it'll take me some time to get it back.

Pygmalion

Have been feeling a lot more at peace with myself and the world of late. So that's given me ample time to ruminate on a lot of things.
I was contrasting my IITD days with my time in IIMA and the first thing that stood out were the kind of friendships I have had with people here. Now I've always considered myself to be a loner kind of guy at the end of it all, but I have to acknowledge, the kind of friends you have does have a bearing on your attitude towards life,at least for the time that you are in close touch. People say that birds of a feather flock together, but to an extent I think even the reverse is true, birds who flock together become of a feather.
The one thing that I can say about my IIT friends is that they were the most discouraging and pessimistic people I have ever met and that kind of rubbed on me as well. Don't get me wrong, I still love them but being with them 24/7 made me a lot like them, giving up on life, hope, optimism and in the end on myself. That's so unlike the true me, I am the eternal optimist, like to think that I have some amount of ability and reasonable internal drive to achieve, but being with them changed that somewhat.
It kind of reminds me of the OB concept we learnt, 'Pygmalion in Management', to put it briefly, a lot of what we achieve is a result of the expectations of ourselves and others around us. Those who believe in themselves tend to achieve. Even those who have people around them who believe in them, even if it is a groundless faith, tend to achieve. The example given is that of 'Sweeney's miracle', where a janitor eventually became a computer expert simply due to the encouragement offered by James Sweeney,a professor of psychology. Doesn't it make you think, what greater gift could you give a person than these simple words, "I believe in you"?
From a young age, I too have had family and friends who have believed in me. In school, my close group of friends were always like "Shubhang is bright, intelligent, well read, honest and doesn't abuse" and it felt good to hear that and I actively strove to live up to this image. Similarly, a lot of my aunts really doted on me, because, and I say this without any arrogance or self-aggrandisement, they perceived me to be a 'good son', good in studies, well behaved, soft-spoken and all that. In school too, my teachers thought that I was something more than just someone who would learn stuff by rote and ooze it out in exams. One of the most encouraging things ever told to me was said by my English teacher in Class 10th, when we were discussing what I wanted to be in life, she remarked "Shubhang, I never want you to tell me that you want to be a doctor or an engineer, you are much too intelligent for that". Again, I must put in a modesty disclaimer, I don't agree with a lot of what she said, but the faith she showed in me was what was amazing. What she really meant was that she would be disappointed if I were to become a typical engineering grad, doing a software coolie job in Infosys or something, she wanted me to aspire to more than that. It is something which has always stayed with me. I don't know if her statement is true or not, but I know one thing for sure, if I ever achieve anything, those words would have had a part to play in that.
Once I entered IITD, I made friends with a lot of guys in my civil department and in particular, I was close to two of them. Both were disappointed with their JEE ranks, as was I, and as is common in the first year, we wanted to do well in order to get a department change, something very difficult to achieve in IITD. Halfway through the first semester, with the rigour of the IIT system taking its toll on us, most people gave up on the department change dream. I too was not doing very well and at that point, if I were to think rationally, I would have probably dropped the idea too. Yet, I had faith in myself and most importantly, faith in the faith of others in me, surely it had to have some basis. I remember sitting down with my friend one day and he told me point blank, "yaar, if you're thinking of a department change, forget about it, it's too difficult for you". That kind of hurt, but I paid no heed to it and resolved to keep working, though not sure if I would get it. A year is a long time in an IIT and my sustained effort saw me not just get a department change but an upgrade into the highest department possible that year. My friend was genuinely astonished.
As the four years unfolded, my friend slipped more and more into depression and pessimism and a lot of that was evident in his dealings with me. Our conversations, whenever they involved what we could hope for and do in the future, always followed the same pattern, he not believing I could do it. "Getting into IIMA? Difficult for you man." That changed when I started topping the Career Forum All India tests. After that he was very supportive of me. But the point is that I always have to prove myself to him to earn his backing, it is never unconditional. Even now, whenever I go back to Delhi, I meet up with him and the pattern has not changed. I tell him that I wanted to be a mathematician, he replies point blank, "dude, do you really think you can achieve something in mathematics, I mean it's really difficult". I then told him that I wanted to be a writer too at some point, pat comes the reply. "dude, I'm not sure you could ever be that good, it's really difficult and it is something you have to have inherently, if you haven't done anything by now, you probably won't ever". So you see, there's never an unconditional "go ahead dude, I'm sure you'll do well", even if based more on hope and faith than on hard facts.
However, nowadays I am trying to break out of this second-hand pessimism that I inherited from him. Take the example of writing itself, I always thought that I was a decent writer, but never had the courage to publish anything I wrote because I used to think, "what if my friend is right, what if I am actually not good enough?". Well last week I wrote a small piece titled "For Whom the Bells Toll", same as the previous post in my blog. I posted it on the Literary nb of Dbabble, our online notice board and lo and behold, I counted 36 messages saying that it was very well written and someone even suggested that I take up writing as a career. Again, let me say that I am not trying to sound arrogant here, but after 4 years of being told nothing but, "dude, your writing most likely isn't good enough", I had forgotten what praise sounds like. And that kept me away from the joy of doing what I liked and I rue the opportunities I missed out because of this fear, both at school and at IITD. So much frustration and all about nothing.
I don't think that I'm the kind of person who has a lot to say to anyone, but if there were two things that I would like to say to anyone who read the above lines,they would be: firstly, follow your heart and believe in yourself, you can't afford to be your own worst enemy in life and secondly, as far as possible, try and back others to achieve their dreams, no matter how unlikely they may be. You can't help whether they achieve them or not, but they'll always be greatful that you believed in them. Sometimes, in friendships and relationships, it's better to let reason, logic and calculation take a back-seat.

"You are the wid beneath my wings"

For Whom the Bells Toll

Man, if anyone ever reads my blog, they'll probably wonder if I am some kind of perennial grouch. So let me put in some lighter stuff as well.
My cousin brother is getting married next month. My cousin sister is getting married next year. My friend Y, a guy I have known for the past 6 years, from our very first day in IITD is getting engaged in December. My BTP partner , Z, a guy with whom in my view no woman in her right mind would even enter a lift, is getting married next year as well to a woman who for all practical purposes seems to have an IQ>100.
You see what I'm getting at right? Try as I might to deny it, my generation is getting old. And in India that means entering matrimony. Don't get me wrong, I've got nothing against marriage, even my parents are married, but you know, I never thought that this day would come for us. I mean, just a couple of years ago, we were all young men, in the prime of our youth, doing all kinds of asinine stuff, roaming aimlessly, no thoughts of domesticity in our minds. And now, people everywhere around me seem to be spawning dynasties.
But then again, its rather hypocritical of me to be launching a broadside against early marriages. After all as far as marriage proposals go, I too have made one, that too at the ripe old age of 17. I remember that day distinctly, she and I were classmates and were sitting on the last bench one fine day, laughing and sharing jokes when I decided to pop the question, " so, ABC, will you marry me?" (yes it was that matter of fact and upfront). Her reaction was not unexpected, she just laughed it off. I like to think that she was flattered, but then again, maybe I kid myself. Actually, now that I think of it, I wonder what I would have done next if she had said yes. Would have been quite a problem, you can't just propose to a girl and then when she accepts say that it was all for a lark.
Would have made a hell of a great story to tell my parents too.

Mom: Hello dear, how was school today?

Self: not bad, same old stuff, physics practical, a couple of homework assignments to submit tomorrow. Pretty ordinary. Oh and by the way, I'm married now, just thought you might like to know.

Mom: What?!!

Self: yeah, I know, it's outrageous, homework that too in class 12th, what a disgrace...

Mom (apoplectic by now): How could you do such a thing, go talk to your father

(Dad's in front of the TV)

Self: Hi Papa, what's up

Dad: You know the real problem with this country? Incompetent fools in positions of responsibility taking stupid decisions that destroy the lives of millions.

Self: What're you watching, the Budget?

Dad: No, cricket. Look at this idiot, putting the opposition into bat when everyone knows that in the later part of summer in England, pitches are a beauty to bat on, unless it happens to be a leap year....

Self: Talking of stupid decisions, I got married today to a classmate of mine...

Dad: ...in which case you should bowl first in Headingly and Old Trafford, unless of course it's the second week of Septemb...what?

Self: I said, I got married today.

Dad: What do you mean got married?!!!

Self: Ok this is how it goes, human societies over the years have evolved a custom called marriage, which is a system under which two people, usually one male and one female, enter into a sort of contractual agreement to share domestic duties and bring up the next generation, hence it is a socio-economic alliance between......

Dad: Idiot, I know what marriage is, I meant how the hell did you manage to do this?

Self: I didn't really expect her to say yes, but once she did, I didn't want to go back on my word, I mean, it looks bad doesn't it?

Dad: I always knew you were the black sheep of the family, much worse than that idiot cousin of yours...

Self: Look you'll like her, she's from a nice Punjabi family, her dad's a......

Dad: PUUUNNNNJJJJJAAAABBBBBIIIII? What do you mean PUUUUNNNNNJJJJJAAAAABBBBBBIIIIII??!!

Self: Ok here we go again, Punjab is a state in the north-western part of India, stretching from the foothills of the Himalayas to the Great Indian Plains, historically, a cradle of civilization, was partioned in...

Dad: Idiot, I know what Punjab is, it's just that...never mind that's beside the point, just tell me, Einstein, how do you plan to support this wife of yours?

Self: Hadn't really thought about it, guess we'll have to fall back on you..

Dad (in one breath): Fall back on us!! I knew you were the black sheep of the family, brought disgrace to us, much like that idiotic cousin of yours, but that's beside the point, listen to me smarty, if you think that I'm going to finance you on your wild adventures then you've got another think coming, I mean you're free to collect a harem if you want but if expect me to...

Self: Clean bowled, it was a good ball too.

Dad: Huh? Oh ok. Yes, I knew he would get him out, it's all a question of pitching it in line, between the stumps, unless of course, you're bowling in Perth, where because of the Freemantle Doctor, you're better off pitching it slightly outside off. Anyway, what were we talking about?

Self: I got married today.

Dad: Oh yeah, silly of me, I forgot. So like I was saying, congratulations and I hope you'll be happy, look forward to meeting her, maybe you can bring her around some time. Where are you off to now?

Self: Have to do homework for tomorrow.

Dad: Homework in Class 12? What a disgrace...


You know, my real problem with my friends/cousins getting married so soon is that, like Jeeves said, once the Mrs. comes in, the relics of bachelorhood go out. Soon when everyone around you is married/is getting married/is looking to get married, the social circle of the bachelor starts contracting, becoming smaller and smaller, till it's a black hole and you become invisible to everyone. Then what do you do in order to pass time on a lazy Saturday evening? The wild, irresponsible frolics of le temps perdu hardly seem feasible when your bosom buddies have to puch a card each time they leave the house. I mean look at me and my BTP partner, we spent most of our final year astride his trusty bike, Lords of all that we surveyed. And now...

Self: Hi BTP partner, wanna cruise this evening.

BTP partner: No man, can't do that. Have to go shopping for Venetian blinds in the evening with the Mrs. and then her second cousin's father in law is coming to visit.

Self (after checking if I'm at the right address): Come on man, we'll ride out on the highway and then go to PVR and check out the women there and maybe....oh Hi Mrs. BTP partner, didn't see you standing there, can I take your husband out to ogle at nubile young college girls just to relive old times.

(Last thing I remeber seeing, just before the door slams in my face, is the look of helplessness on my buddy's face, a look which is crying out, "rescue me man, rescue me, I mean we're talking Venetian blinds here")


So you see, I have a vested interest in making sure that my bachelor friends remain bachelors. The biggest impediment to that however, is my own family. My uncle is trying to get his son, another cousin of mine jump into the matrimony game as well. He's bored to death, now nearing retirement and so to pass time, he scouts around for suitable matches for his son. And the inventor of the internet would have never imagined the terror that he was helping unleash on bachelorhood - matrimonial sites. Now my uncle after finishing his sessions on ICICI direct, logs into bharatmatrimony.com, indianbrides.com, tamilsangam.com, entering my cousin's details in them. My cousin is waging a brave battle so far, but I fear he will be one more martyr to the cause. And then I will have reason to be really worried. You see, he's just a year elder to me and my father would hate to be upstaged by his relatives in the filial matrimony stakes. But this time, I'm going to be prepared for him...

Dad: Uh son, I think, you know, it's time for you to get married, why even that idiot cousin of yours has a son and I'll be damned if my son is going to be a....

Self: Sure Dad, let's discuss this in front of the TV, I think the game's about to start and this time we're batting first

Dad: Batting first!!!! Who makes these jokers the captain? Everyone knows that the low pressure area in the Arabian Ocean means that the ball is likely to jag around....I'm going to write to my MP about this, they haven't heard the last of me....


With 210 days of cricket lined up on ESPN-Star, I think my chances of surviving are pretty good. Rupert Murdoch, thank you so much, I could marry you*.




* In a figurative way of course!

Coming back to life

It's ironic that I should be writing this now,when I feel exactly the opposite, but for the past week or so, I felt as though I was coming out of the stupor that has enveloped me for the last 3 years. I can't explain how it happened, but the first signs of it were when
I started getting angry again. I think I read somewhere that Anger is the most primal of human emotions and despite its destructive
connotations, it also carries in it the seed of revolution and change. I think every revolution, every advancement in human history
has occurred because someone somewhere was angry about something.
Anyway, I don't know what happened but for the past 3 years I have been under some kind of sedation, nothing seemed to make me angry.
Whatever would happen, I was resigned to accepting it. That's a dangerous slide into indifference. And I can feel that I slid from
being the disciplined, vivacious and active young man that I have always been and became trapped in a morass of inaction. I stopped
having any expectations from myself, and I feel that was the point where I started stagnating. I became the ultimate
self-defeatist, whatever task you gave me, I would have lost even before I tried.Anyway, the point is that in the past week,
somethings have happened that have been a kind of re-awakening. I won a paper contest in MDI (slightly fraudulent, but none the less),
cracked a CCCS case (that's a course taken by RaviC - imagine Hitler and Anne Robinson of the Weakest link having a love child and you
would get some idea of how hard a task master this guy is), got an Insight pitch after making a 28 slide ppt in 3 hours
singlehandedly, did well in a couple of courses last term and suddenly, the old Shubhang was back.
Concomitantly, I started getting angry, I no longer felt that everthing was futile, that my efforts would make no difference to any eventual outcome. I had standards and expectations, both from myself and from people around me, for the first time in 3 years, I felt that I had the power to determine what happens not just to me but to everytyhing around me. No longer was I moping, I was
almost cocky. I know it sounds terribly self-aggrandizing but try to appreciate what kind of a human doormat I had become, this was
like a nuclear bomb exploding. More importantly, I once again became the fierce independent spirit that I had always
been at least in my ideals. No longer was I content to crib about the system and how horrible and unfair it is. I now back myself
to play the game as per the rules and win. I also got thinking about what I had become after coming to this place. I always used to
have visions, not goals like the rest of my classmates. I remember as a school kid, when everyone would want to be a movie star or a
cricketer, I told my teacher that I wanted to be the Pime Minister of India. Later when I joined as a civil engineer in IIT Delhi, I
wanted to build massive irrigation projects to bring water and electricity to people, when I got a branch upgrade to electrical
engineering, I wanted to be involved in laying down massive transmission lines and setting up power stations to bring light to each and every home in India. It may sound corny but
that is truly the way I used to think. But the problem is that the IITs are grooming grounds for software clerks, hence in the last two
years it became clear to me that I would not be able to achieve my grandiose dreams through this avenue. So in a show of defiance, a sort of middle finger up to my teachers, I took the CAT and landed up here in IIMA.
It's funny how things turn out but after coming to this place, the bastion of greed and self-serving thought in India, I have refound the idealist Shubhang who had been suppressed
for so long. It took a lecture, one case discussion by RaviC to set the ball rolling. We were discussing the work of an NGO in
Bangladesh and in his typical caustic style, he taunted all 96 of us "you know, I just wanted to give you an experience of what it is
like to achieve a social objective like radicating poverty, because most of you will never think of this again in your life, you'll
be out there in the corporate world, making deals and selling stuff".Is this what I have become being among these people? I wanted to shout out in his class that that's not true, some of us did feel a lot of social responsibility.
Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that coming here, especially the second year here has rekindled a lot in me,
made me think once again of what do I want to achieve in the long term. Getting a job and all is important and fine, but if you think
that you are bright and capable enough, do you have the guts to do something that has a vision behind it? I am not implying that there
is a natural hierarchy of professions and vocations, but anything if done with the mindset of a vision behind it is more likely
to not just succeed, but leave you more contented at the end of it.

Hmmmm...it's good to write down stuff in this manner, I feel much better already.